He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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