Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize