I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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