we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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