i just wanna soil my oats bro
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
