Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
