Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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