please come you make the beer taste better
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Randomize
