And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Randomize
