Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
