South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I will pee on everything he values.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize