ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
