how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
