Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
