I can't watch pbs sober anymore
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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