You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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