I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
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