You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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