if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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