Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
