idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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