People in love make me want to vomit
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
