They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
A bitchslap is in order.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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