Everything about him screamed your future.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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