I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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