He is an equal opportunity slut.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
