marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Buhtt sex?
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Randomize
