Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
where does the pee come out of this thing
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
