well I can't set my house on fire every night
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Just puked most of my soul out..
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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