I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
