Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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