We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
