There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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