I want to make a zoo with you.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Do vagina's smell?
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
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