I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize