Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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