what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
