She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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