woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize