My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Randomize