My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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