her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
