My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
My ATM looks so different sober.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
