just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize