so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
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