I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Randomize
