We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
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