wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
