can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize