"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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