He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
