Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
